shared these words from my heart ♥️ on their feed today. Give them a follow!
“I have dug my hole so deep in life I'm wondering when I'll reach the end and if I can even possibly dig it any deeper.”
This is the message I sent to my friend during a time I considered ending my life.
A series of abusive relationships, adultery, accumulated pain from my past, sexual assault and turning to alcohol to numb myself left me devastated, isolated and with no hope for my future.
I felt trapped in a prison that I played a part in creating. I looked to men to rescue, heal and accept me instead of looking to Jesus. I dragged my deep wounds into my relationships, hurting everybody in my path.
It was during my engagement that I fully realized my life was unmanageable and, if I didn’t change, I would continue to destroy myself while taking others down with me.
Shame and fear weighed me down like an anchor. What could God possibly want with a girl who's damaged goods and has a rap sheet a mile long?
I was repulsed by my own past, but I knew in my heart the bravest step I could take was to allow God into my brokenness. And that's exactly what I did.
Slowly, God began to pick up my broken, fragmented pieces and put me back together again. He miraculously made me more beautiful than before with scars on my heart as evidence of God’s healing. With my own eyes, I saw Jesus restore the years the locust had eaten and reveal to me there's purpose even in paralyzing pain. #weareunveiled