Check out my new infusion backpack 💩🎒 that my siblings won for me at the arcade!
On Friday, I got word from my LLMD that the glutathione was working, my eosinophils were almost in normal range, and could I schedule an appointment with her to discuss next steps. I was ecstatic! To celebrate, I spent the day with my younger siblings. It was the last day of their spring break and they hadn’t seen me in over a month because my health hadn’t cooperated. So when they said they wanted to go to a nickel arcade, I said yes. But I was nervous. I hadn’t brought my wheelchair because it’s too heavy for me to lift and my mom can’t handle lifting it all the time, so I have to make trade offs regarding when and how I use it.
I said yes, despite my worries, because life is about living in the now as best as we can. Part of doing that with chronic illness is finding a balance between saying yes whenever I can and trying not to overdo it. And that looks different every day.
How that looked on Friday, was me going to the arcade, but spending the entire time posted up on a stool nearby whatever game my siblings were playing. But I had a blast playing games with them, scheming and strategizing how to win the most tickets, and celebrating with lit up faces when we won. By the time our nickels were drained, the adrenaline had faded and I became very much aware that I was headed for a crash.
I used to be really hard on myself when I crashed. I’d blame myself for overdoing it again and not knowing my limits. But the reality with #mecfs
is that my limits are constantly changing; and sometimes I’m going to choose to do something that enriches my life, knowing it may cause me to crash, because the potential costs, however likely, are worth it. It’s about knowing when the trade offs make sense.
There’s so much I don’t get to choose, so when I can, I choose joy, even if I may pay for it later. What are you choosing?
#sayingyes #sayyes #liveinthepresent #findingbalance #ichoosejoy #choosejoy #crashing #familytimeisqualitytime #wherethetiredgirlsare #infusionbackpack #emojipoop #lymediseaseawareness #mecfsawareness #fightlikeawarrior