Gonna hit 2k followers real fucking soon guys
I think I used to have this idea that once I was in recovery for "x" amount of years, I would be immune from my eating disorder. For so long, I was practicing recovery because it was routine - my "new normal." The mere thought of relapse was unacceptable.
But then life happens, and suddenly Ed seems to gain power again. What once was a distant memory feels like just yesterday, and I am reminded of the many reasons why eating disorders are such powerful, complex, and exhausting mental illnesses. No matter how far into recovery I get, I think a tiny piece of me will always miss my eating disorder. When life is great, I don't need Ed. But when life is hard, Ed seems like a comforting fallback - a miserable one, but an eerily comforting one at the same time.
It's these moments that make recovery so hard. But in these moments, we can choose to fight. These moments give us a chance to show Ed just how much better we are without him. A chance to show the Enemy exactly who he is messing with. And a chance to bravely choose recovery over relapse - one day at a time 💘💪 #recovery #relapse #nottodaysatan #edrecovery #eatingdisorderawareness #eatingdisorderrrcovery #anorexiarecovery #ednos #ednosrecovery #osfed #recoverywarrior #prorecovery #staystrong
First day of vacation today was absolutely awesome! I was so afraid of this trip because food, numbers,bulimia, weight etc. But today was really great! On the third pic you can see my breakfast on the left: low fat curd with oats and melon + coffee (250) and my lunch on the right: Bell pepper and chicken breast (230). Then I had another cup of coffee with rice milk and half of this giant apple in the afternoon (70). For dinner I had this salad (without the onion and the bread stick and as little of the dressing as possible; 220) aaaaand after I walked around a lot in the evening and went swimming I also had a protein shake and a carrot as night snack (160). So I have consumed 930kcal which is a liiittle bit too much for me in my opinion, 40 less would kinda have been okay which is totally stupid haha. So I’m trying to be as calm as possible because this day was super fun! Had a nice road trip, arrived Input amazing hotel, went shoppen, to a restaurant, to the beach and then stepped into the indoor pool🤩 I’m so much happier than I expected I could be here omg🙆🏼♀️ btw: I didn’t throw up at all today 😎 #happy #niceday #apple #fooddiary #food #meals #mealplan #ana #mia #edrecovery #eatingdisorderrecovery #bulimiarecovery #bulimia #relapse #salad #protein #beach
Before I say what I am about to say let me say this about Eminem, his lyrical ability is still incrediable and he will probably go down in most people's list as a top 10 rapper. Nobody in the game right now is even onpar with his witty remarks and wordplay.
However, Revival was the worst piece of work he's ever come out with and will forever be a stain on his legacy. Then Kamikaze was a response to the justified critisim that he got from Revival. Him calling out people like Tyler the creator and Earl just makes him seem extremly bitter... His rapping is still good but what he has been saying lately in his songs is bullshit 🤷🏾♂️ (The slideshow are a few of the songs that show how great Em was and can still be)
Mein Frühstück vom Montag😊
Die letzten beiden Tage waren sehr schwer für mich, irgendwie ging alles schief. Meine Mum hat uns gesagt das wir ein kleines Geschwistertes bekommen werden, dass sie im dritten Monat schwanger ist. Einen Tag darauf (also gestern) hat sie es verlohren, sie bekam starke Bauchkrämpfe und Blutungen. Sie meint ihr geht es gut, aber ich sehe die Traurigkeit in ihren Augen😔 ich will nicht egoistisch Klingen aber mir geht es auch nicht gut, ich habe mich schon sehr auf mein neues Geschwistertes gefreut. Ich kann nicht mitansehen wie meine Mum so Leidet, aber ich weiss nicht wie ich ihr helfen kann.
Dazu kommt noch der Wiegetermin von Gestern, der nicht gut war, TW ich habe 1.2 Kg abgenommen, weil ich es einfach nicht hinbekomme zu essen 😓 dabei versuche ich immer mein bestes zu geben, meine Anorexie ist einfach zu stark.
Mein Körper ist nur noch TW 4Kg TWE davon entfernt wieder normal zu sein aber meiner Psyche geht es schlimmer als jeh zuvor. Ich muss eben einfach stark sein, einfach essen 😖 ich will nicht das meine Familie sich um mich sorgen muss, ich will nicht zuviel Platz in anspruch nehmen. ABER ICH WILL LEBEN OHNE ANOREXIE. ICH MUSS KÄMPFEN
#anorexia #Anorexie #Anorexianervosa #ed #edwarrior #edfighter #recovery #recovering #recover #progress #Magersucht #sport #fit #fitness #healthy #eat #Magersuchtrecovery #exercise #fitness #eatittobeatit #stronger #Anorexic #Ed #orthorexic #ortorexia #weightloss #relapse #inpatient #positive #fight
already posting a filler for my theme bc I feel like I'll fall asleep soon. the talk w my doctor went better than expected. I'm officially discharged fron the clinic after over 2 years outpatient treatment!! also the ward is for children and teens and I'm almost 21 so they wouldn't be allowed to treat me anymore. the goodbye was really sweet actually, my doctor played a song on the piano before I left. I was worried for nothing about dad's opinion bc he was understanding and encouraging that not he's gonna control me but that I learn to keep an eye on myself. thus he suggested buying a new scale and I guess I'll do that tmrw. been walking a lot this afternoon and it was really warm again plus I didn't sleep last night. wanted to do so much but also just sleep. I was even too tired for stretching so I've been laying on my yoga mat most of the time now and maybe go to bed soon
I think Eminem fell off to be honest, I'll explain more in my next post.