So I hit the streets tonight for the first time in a long time. Some of you know that I’ve had a real love hate relationship with performing this last year. I’d stopped advertising and handing out cards, I hadn’t touched hoops or juggling clubs in almost 8 months, the only time I was doing magic was at the bar with friends. The past 5 years of my life have been centered around entertainment and it became my entire identity in a way I resented. I found it irritating to be introduced as the guy who does the circus stuff, I found it hard to meet people who weren’t other performers, I got sick of telling people about my weird hobby, struggled to remember what kinds of things I liked before I ever picked up a hoop or a set of clubs. Despite my persistent efforts to extract myself from it, I kept getting calls for gigs from people who had some how mysteriously tracked me down from a business card their friend’s sister picked up two years ago. I found myself frustrated and anxious at gigs, just waiting for them to get over. There was no love in any of this for me, which was the whole reason I stated it all: because I loved what I did and sharing it with others. Fast forward to tonight I decided to rekindle my broken romance by going back to my roots in street theatre. I was exhausted today, starting to come down with something, and still had a million things to do but I forced myself to go out anyway. About an hour into performing tonight I had a gentlemen pull his car over in the middle of the street , get out, walk all the way up to my hat just to drop a single dollar in. He smiled awkwardly and said, “I’m sorry it’s not enough.” And without another word he got back into his car and drove away. I was absolutely speechless. I would trade his single dollar and the all the gratitude and humility behind it for a hundred nights of good tips, a thousand even. People who can still look at something as stupid as juggling with all the freshness and wide eyed wonder he did tonight give me hope and remind me why I do what I do.
#busker #busking #jugglersofinstagram #juggling #streetperformer #kindstrangers #circuseverydamnday #circuslife #manayunk