So today was a different day. I farewelled my grandma who passed away in hospital last week at a beautiful service.
Unlike many in the same situation, I wasn’t sad by the passing. I have a great understanding of the afterlife and what happens when we die and have communicated many times with passed over loved ones so I know whole heartedly she has gone to a better place. Don’t get me wrong, death is extremely sad in many cases. Murder, car accidents, childhood illness etc the list is endless. But when you are at the end of your life and the quality just isn’t what it used to be and you’re tired, I would look forward to nothing more than to go home. The hardest part is knowing the grief that her close loved ones left behind are feeling.
Being a medium, I was a little anxious going to a funeral. I’ve actually only been to a couple prior many many years ago. I was worried about feeling everyone’s grief too deeply and not being able to keep myself together. I did have moments of extreme sadness but I got to see and communicate with my grandma throughout the service and it was so special. When I visited her in the open casket when I arrived she was standing right next to it. She expressed her happiness at the way they had made her look and she didn’t want people to be sad because she was happy, and followed that with the comment “well you would already know that”. Throughout the service she moved between comforting her husband and her daughter and son as they gave speeches.
This was an experience I haven’t had before, but one I’m so grateful for. One thing I’m very conscious of is other people’s beliefs. I chose not to tell her close family what I saw, as I wasn’t sure on how it would be received and it’s such an emotional time it’s not always tactful to bring these things up. Some people are really amazed and appreciative of the work a medium does but others think it’s fake or the devils work ect so I’m always really conscious of what I tell people. I kind of go by following this rule, the ones who need me will find me, and if someone hasn’t asked, don’t tell.
Give your loved ones an extra hug tonight ❤️ sending everyone lots of blessings xoxo
Not meant to offend anyone... Just when I thought I had experienced the worst of pain living with stage 4 endo and countless sleepless nights of agony. I had my dream ripped apart.. 2.5 years of hard work and dedication gone in a flash...I would rather deal with endo pain right now, simply because I know how to deal with it...
#loss #ivf #ivfjourney #endometriosis #endometriosisawareness #pain #grief
This is vital! Boundaries are crucial to your mental, emotional and physical wellbeing - otherwise you become a shell of a person who is constantly drained by energy vampires. It’s been a crucial part of my recovery and I still vacillate between the old and the new! Just keep persisting. Learn the word “NO”. I found/find it starts with saying “NO” to the inner critic, then to the people in your immediate environment (perhaps you start with the abusers in your life or just mere acquaintances or the girl at the coffee shop who is pushy). You’ll find a way that naturally works FOR YOU! Just keep persisting! And know it’s ok to trip up and fall backwards, especially when guilt, fear and shame throttle you saying you have to “please others” and “you’re bad for having needs” - tell it to “fuck off”; tell those introjects that you DO deserve respect, love and care. Tell it and yourself you DO have needs, wants, dreams and you’re going to meet them. You’ll feel the internal battle; but KEEP GOING!! Don’t give up on yourself, that’s why I’m here now and why I’ll keep going. Even writing this reminds me how far I’ve come and I’m proud of myself! #mentalhealthawareness #complexptsd #mentalhealth #ptsd #cptsd #grief #grieve #grieving #sad #anxiety #depression #trauma #traumatic #childhood #narcissist #narcissisticabuse #family #personalgrowthjourney #growth #selflove #selfcare #keepgoing #dontgiveup #dontsufferinsilence #yougotthis
The ebola epidemic in Congo is now the second largest outbreak in history and have, so far, affected at least 426 people leaving 245 dead.
Pascaline Masika is one of them and her grieving daughters wait outside the MSF Ebola treatment center in Butembo for a ICRC team to take their mother the cemetary. The International Red Cross is responsible for ”safe burials” with strict protocols due to the risk of contamination. The body is descinfetcted, secured and only the staff from the team are allowed to touch the coffin.
The outbreak was declared the first of August and the work of the Congolese health ministry staff, the Red Cross and MSF (Doctors without Borders) is essential. More than 41,000 people have been vaccinated so far, but the outbreak could have already resulted in more than 10,000 Ebola cases according to the congolese health ministry.
Reports are now coming in that the disease have reached the one million city of Butembo itself creating fear of an acceleration of cases. .
Upcoming story in @dagens_nyheter
.#photojournalism #photo #foto #fotojournalistik #bild #bildjournalistik #fotografi #photography #picture #war #Butembo #MSF #Läkareutangränser #Congo #Ebola #Grief #Canon @lakareutangranser
The View From Here. Day 16. True friends listen. As I laid down upon the concrete, the heat from the midday sun had soaked into the grit, keeping me as warm as the last hug you gave me. I tousled the bark between my finger tips, re imagining the lazy afternoons we would give your feline companions makeovers of the frightful variety, their hair static from the hours of our hands massaging them in silent rhythm. I close my eyes and I see flickers of yellow, black, orange, flittering upon the twitching canvas of my eyelids. If I concentrate really, really hard, I can feel you holding my hands. I make great big gulping sobs, a broken promise to you to live a happy life. When I am with you, I am my happiest. Willow paddles in the lake with ducks admonishing her. Sulfur crest cockatoos squawk in play with one another, twisting their heads this way and that. ‘Look! Cockies!’ I shout. I walk barefeet in the grass, and admire the wonder of natural life. Bottle brushes, succulents, birds of paradise. I bought this tiny trinket box when I was travelling in New Zealand. I had an overwhelming need to buy it, with no idea of whom to gift it. Each time I considered it, it didn’t feel right. Today, as I grabbed my keys to come see you, I spied that trinket box. It’s purpose could not have been more clear. In your eulogy, I spoke of the power of statistics and infinite love. My dress, printed in palm fronds flickered up around me in the hot air, a thunderstorm brewing clouds of black coffee. ‘The infinity represents the bonding of lives through friendship, loyalty and love, for all eternity’. I heard you whisper back, fluent in clarity. ‘Infinitely’.
This is for those who will struggle over this festive period.
Christmas and New Year’s Eve can be extremely challenging for people who find themselves neither in periods of happiness nor good health.
Two years ago, at Christmas, my father-in-law was dying from an aggressive cancer and we were ferrying the kids and ourselves in and out of Grace McKellar.
Last year was the first Christmas without him and the grief was palpable for my husband and his loved ones. And, so often as it does, the aftermath and impact on the family was great and long-lasting.
The holidays are not only hard for those in the midst of grief or actively grieving someone ill or terminally ill, it’s often a point of contention for split families.
Sadly, special events and a parent’s desperation to see their child/children, can be used as a weapon by both parties or by one to inflict pain upon the other.
What should be a joyous event is marred by incessant back and forward texting or calls attempting to manipulate or bargain with an ex.
Children are not pawns and events are not the right time nor place to demand things of one another.
For families with someone is sick or dying, the realness that this is your last Christmas brings with it an indescribable sadness. Because as long as that person is still breathing, and still present in the world, everything is as it should be.
Once they are gone the cracks become canyons.
The world is shouting at you to be joyous, happiness is everywhere and yet your falling apart to the backdrop of Chirstmas carols and cheer.
I write this for people who find themselves on the other side of the world, who will eat lunch alone. Individuals; able to avoid the day to day loneliness until Christmas where they can’t hide from the fact they have nowhere to go.
No one that needs them.
For the families at war with one another, where everything is magnified. I want you to know I am thinking of you.
For fathers or mothers that will miss out on seeing their kids, it’s not fair but don’t let it make you bitter. Do your best to try and not be consumed by it.
Go to @motherhoodtales
on Facebook for the full story #family #loss #grief #christmas
The unknown wave. A haiku for my dad.
The trees seem to whisper,
Be still and know,
Where the waters meet below the willow tree,
Faith and life combine,
I see you.
#grief #poetry #therapy #pain #mindandbody
Day 69 - a huge day. On the bus to work wearing my mother’s day rings from R and G. First day I’m going in after all this happened and at the end of my maternity leave. Just for coffee and to break the ice before I start to try and come back in January. Been on the verge of tears all morning - this is facing up to this new life I don’t want and it’s hard. Really hard but I’ve brushed my hair, got dressed and even if I cry through it I’m doing it because G always said I was the toughest person he knew and I won’t let him down even if I need the world’s supply of tissues. Work has always been my thing and I need something back for me. Plus, I have some great friends who are meeting me for coffee and escorting me in - I’ll probably feel like Beyoncé with her slightly more chaotic entourage (more smudged makeup...) #entourage #work #maternityleave #widow #youngwidow #returntowork #grief #griefjourney #griefishardwork #waterproofmascara #bus
We all do that... assume there will always be another day, another opportunity, another moment, and yet the tragic reality is that this may be completely untrue. 😢
If there is a first day there will be a last day... but we don’t like to talk about that do we? ✔️
Be sooooo thankful for those in your life right now, make the effort to connect. ⭐️
I love working with people who have experienced loss, to see them get quick change to the life they want, but believe is too far, too hard or too whatever to get. It can be different, you can get there!
2018 has been a year of immense loss and transformation for me.
I have come to understand that love and connection extend way beyond the physical body, and that grief is fertile ground for growth.
I have learnt to surrender to the evolution of life, and to find solace and promise in change.
I’ll be sending out my 2018 wrap up soon, so make sure to sign up for my words of wisdom (link in my bio).
#grief #lifeafterloss #personalgrowth #fosteringhopepsychology #wordsofwisdom
Loss Becomes Losses
The grief you feel when you lose a loved one can be so much more complex than mourning their absence in your life. Particularly for young adults encountering new responsibilities and learning to map out their futures, a monumental loss can throw their lives out of balance and sync. Loss of a loved one suddenly becomes loss of purpose, loss of guidance and support, loss of identity and loss of self belief/worth, not to mention the practical difficulties associated with losing financial support and a secure and stable home life. ..
That is one of major reasons why we should never place any time limit on grief. It may take a young adult many years to rebuild and repair their lives, and even then it may still feel incomplete. Young adults should never feel pressure to 'move on' or 'get on with it'. We should give them the time and space they need #YNN #griefandloss
What is Emotional Intelligence?
Emotional intelligence refers to ones ability to monitor their own emotional state and taking responsibility of how they are showing up and processing their emotions. It is also about awareness and empathy with other people's emotional states and to use this information to act wisely in relationships.
Emotional intelligence has five key parts:
Self-awareness: recognising internal feelings (all emotions even what you perceive as negative ones). Managing emotions: finding ways to handle emotions that are appropriate to the situation. Productively releasing and moving through all emotions, including the heavier emotions like anger (releasing in a healthy and non-harmful way)
Motivation: using self-control to channel emotions toward a goal.
Empathy: understanding the emotional perspective of other people.
Social skill and enhanced relationships: using personal information and information about others which will assiting in enhancing relationships in your life as this improves connection and our feelings of being connected.
Strength comes from rising through challenges and the hard times through life. We ALL experience some level and different types of traumas in life, the event was probably not your fault, but healing from it is 100% your responsibility ♡
Today we celebrate 3 years of @mayasrest
Over the last three years we have supported more than forty families and provided them with a little break, often during heartbreaking and emotionally exhausting times. We have hosted families for free mini breaks, lunches, retreats and this year our first funday for siblings of children who have passed away 👼🏻
As we reflect on the last three years we give thanks to all the wonderful people who have helped us reach this milestone. Thank you to our amazing family and friends as well as individuals, organisations, local clubs and businesses that support us with no expectation of anything in return, so that we can concentrate on helping families in need. Your support and belief in us keeps us going ~ thank you 🙏🏻💕
We give thanks for donations of all kinds (financial, goods, services), activities, cafe meals and family photography, help on the property and for referrals from medical professionals and specialists. Also to media outlets that help us reach families by sharing our story and also our social media community ~ thank you all 🙏🏻💕
Thank you to every single family that has visited Maya’s Rest for respite. We are honoured that you have trusted our family to care for yours, especially during very difficult times.
Keep your eye out for some big developments in the year to come, as we work hard behind the scenes towards our goal of one day being able to offer this free support on a full time basis 🤞🏻
#mayasrest #thankyou #community #yassvalley #cbrregion #canberra #regionalnsw #freerespite #familyrespite #seriouslyillkids #sickkids #bereavedfamily #grief #support #birthday #threeyears #grateful #yass #happydays #makingmemories #children #love #family
When grief strikes,
It can feel like an arrow through the heart.
Even with a brave smile on your face,
You can feel the hole that no one else can see.
It's an emotional wound
to the loss you currently feel.
The arrow won't feel like it's there forever.
It takes time & working through the emotions to heal ♡
. 📸 art by @sandra.cumplido
This will be my 2nd Christmas since my Mom passed away. My 5th since my Dad and 6th Christmas since my sister passed. These are the people who know my story but they are no longer with me to share it. Time doesn’t heal the emptiness. The lump in my throat or tears that sting my eyes come without warning. I miss them. Hug your loved ones often and tell them you love them. Don’t hold silly grudges because there is no lonelier feeling than words left unsaid. #griefjourney #grief #memories #family #alzheimers #parkinsonsdisease #vasculitis
it’s been two years since we lost my dear mum. i will never forget the state I was in when I found out she’s left the earth side. the pain I felt and still feel is literally indescribable. i was blessed with the best mum, ever. she sacrificed SO much for us to give us the best life. she was loud, and lived loud. you could hear her laugh from miles away, lol. it’s been really hard to learn to live without her. she was my go to person for pretty much everything. the physical absence is hard, man. even more so now that I’m expecting my second baby. it’s not been an easy journey, but I know I’ll be fine. I will enter 2019 strong and happy because I know I have the best guardian angel watching over me & our family! miss you forever, mum. rest peacefully my angel. 🕊🌿✨💕
Good Morning, this is @kirstymitchellphotography
continuing my take over during the opening week of my exhibition 'Wonderland' at Fotografiska. Today I wanted to share another very personal image from the Wonderland series, shot in the woods, just after the dawn. This piece is entitled 'The Distant Pull of Remembrance', it is about a realisation within myself that after almost 3 years of obsessively immersing myself in creating the series, that I had in actual fact lost sight of the people who were closest to me, who loved me and wanted to help me through the loss of my mother. At the exhibition the description reads - “I need to be present for the people in my life who are still with me in the here and now, rather than always clinging to the past. Remembrance should mean taking steps forward as well as being able to look back.’ .And so this photograph was another lesson to myself, a positive message full of hope, that I should look forward and not dwell so deeply on what had happened. I wish you all a good day full of light !
#kirstymitchellphotography #fotografiska #thewonderlandseries #thewonderlandbook #hope #grief #love
I’m mad as fuck. Mad you’re not here to listen to me bitch. Mad you’re not here for me to be mad AT. We’d sit next to each other mad as hell after a fight, & still offer each other food. Still never leave the room. When I did, I’d have a text by the time I reached the parking lot. Mad you’re not here to tell me I need to suck it up. You had a way of validating my feelings but never letting me sit in it for too long, because you knew I could get dramatic. Mad when you wouldn’t listen to doctors. Mad when I’d leave to run errands. You’d get mad there wasn’t a veggie option because you always shared your food with me. Grief feels different everyday. & today it is tossing out my happy ending and settling for any ending because I’m mad it’s not you. #grief #love #loss #griefstory #griefquotes
You stand there bravely
As the sun falls out of the sky
(And darkness steals every colour)
And on its way down
It throws its light onto one side of your face
Leaving the other in shadow
And I can’t remember
If I’ve ever seen anything so lovely before.
A peaceful surrender.
Only one who believes in morning
Could so easily embrace the night.
I’ve taken my Instagram theme and popped it in the bin. Aesthetics aren’t always important. I didn’t photograph Leighton to appease my need to have a flowing Instagram feed. I photographed the memories, the moments I needed to remember, to savour.
This view was my newborn view of Leight’s, he adored being wrapped up close to my chest, he wasn’t overly fond of lying down, ever. I am thankful today and everyday for these snuggles, both of us a little hot and sticky from milk, sweat and love. I am forever grateful Leighton didn’t like to sleep independently. Like he knew our time together was limited and I was going to need these moments to hold on to. The little boy, who never liked to be put down, to be held and loved. However frustrating at times that may have been.
Always Leighton. Love like starlight never dies 💙
(This post was originally supposed to be about Christmas but, I got carried away with the memories 💙)
#lovelikestarlightneverdies #griefsupport #grief #grievingmother #grievingparents #griefbecomesus #bereavedparents #bereavedmother #thatsdarling #rainbowbaby #lifeis #lifeafterdeath #lifeafterloss #throughamotherseyes #storytellingmama
#motherhoodinspired #motherhoodunited #unitedinmotherhood #motherhoodthroughinstagram #childrenofinstagram #kids_of_our_world #candidchildhood #beyond_motherhood
Dear Mom and Dad, 2018
Here is a letter of lesson, pain, joy and gratitude... New blog post. Link in bio, and FB.