This will forever be my favorite photo of us. I just told my friend today to make a conscious effort to take more photos with her Mom. I've realized I don't have enough photos of you, I really don't. Enough photos of us together - that is what I seem to be missing. It doesn't feel real you've been gone for 3 years today. I haven't hugged you, laughed with you, held your hand, heard you yell at me on the phone because you know you called me 4 times and I said I "missed" every single one. I've missed everything about you, but lately I've come to the realization that I even miss the littlest of things we were able to share together: making you cry after reading each card I gave you (thus, bringing me to tears as well), showing you which lipstick color to really wear (and throwing out your bad color choices *coral orange*), having you give me 4 kisses hello and goodbye, teaching you what certain phrases meant (some not suitable for your ears but you insisted on knowing what it meant), and most of all I miss coming into your room and you saying "Hi Honey. How's it going?" or "Hi Darling. Oh, what's wrong?! Sit.Tell me," and I'd crawl into your lap even a few years ago at my age. I just miss you. So so much. All day I've been waiting until I got home from my trip to listen to your voicemails. I'll hear you tell me how much you love me and that not a day goes by that you don't miss me and I'm not on your mind. You'll also say in one message, "OK honey. Well I love you, and I miss you. I'm going to get to see you again soon, honey?!" And on a day like today, Mommie, I'll tell you - that's exactly what I need to hear. Because for one beautifully, brief and fleeting moment, I can close my eyes and pretend I'm talking to you. I can let the message pause in places and return your, "I love you. God bless you. Good night. Sweet dreams. Love you all the way around the world and back again." It will feel like you're here, where you belong. Because you're my heart and that will never ever change. I know it won't. I know you know that soon enough we will get to see each other and we can laugh together again and be together. I love you & miss you more than you could even imagine.