I remember this one college test I took that had my hands sweating so much that, when the papers dried, you could see where my fists had been balled up on it or where my fingers had been holding onto the corners. My hands had never sweated that much for anything. But going in, I knew I was well prepared, and in the end, I finished the test in 20 minutes and got 98%. 🤷♀️
That happened to me a lot in college: I'd be worried out of my mind about some little project or grade or such, & it always turned out fine. Even when it didn't...somehow it did. There was always that pull between thinking, "Why worry? It always turns out fine." & "Maybe it always turns out fine because I always worry." But I made a choice to go with my more optimistic notions, and that's where this self-advice came from. Because, things did always turn out ok, even on occasions when I worried very little. (Maybe not 0%, but very little.)
That was back in college, when I had tests and other small mountains to climb constantly to show me that my optimism was still justified. Now, unfortunately, there are no such milestones, & I'm finding it very difficult to continue feeling like everything is going to be okay. Like I shouldn't worry. Especially since I've had what FEELS like months of comically bad luck. Back in college, if I failed one test, for instance, it usually turned out that everyone had failed the test and the professor was going to give extra credit options or it turned out that I'd been doing so well in other areas that the test wouldn't affect my grade much. There were always end-of-semester grades to look at as an indicator of how things went. Now, I dont know what to look at, how to stay positive.
So, even though I do think the message is good advice, my honest disclaimer is that I have a lot of trouble following it.
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