alexandra elle

writing + taking care. @theheygirlpodcast host. pre-order @todayiaffirm :

can’t / won’t / doesn’t want to / wasn’t mean’t to. — and that’s okay.
I wrote this over 5 years ago in my first book, Words from a Wanderer. I remember this time in my life clearly. My heart was broken, and I was in desperate need for some relief. I was slowly but surely discovering my power and understanding the realization that I had to be the common ground for my healing. Self-love taught me how to mend my heart. After years of feeling abandoned, neglected, hurt, silenced, unseen, and victimized, I had to shift my way of thinking. I was constantly living in a state of lack and fear, which wasn't sustainable. I had to choose to let love be louder in my life, and that was hard for me. Deciding to stop being the victim and start discovering my power was a radical act of reclaiming myself and finding my joy. Love is a choice, on all fronts. And I continue to lean into that truth, years later. It would've been easy to let depression and anxiety win, but I chose to stand. It would've been easy to hold a grudge against those who have hurt me, but I chose to heal. It would have been easy to be miserable and sad and unmotivated to love after countless heartbreaks, but I chose to nurture my heart back to life. I share this to say that we are resilient. We are not victims of our circumstances. We don't have to stay broken or destroyed when we encounter pain. We can heal ourselves. We can get back up. We can choose to love through it. We are powerful enough to piece ourselves back together. Remember that. Don't ever silence your heart's song for those who aren't able to hear it. Keep showing up in your process, even when it's uncomfortable and hard, and messy.
Affirmations on fear. Sticky notes to fear. Love letters to fear. Gratitude for fear. Understanding + unpacking fear, daily. Standing tall, always, through it! . . Swipe and screenshot and hold close what you need. . . @todayiaffirm ’s writing practice of the week was to write a letter to our fear. I challenge you to take it on. To greet your fear head on, and address is it with grace. . . Big love, A.
This has been keeping me balanced and in harmony with my emotions lately. I’ve been learning over the past few years that I have to be my biggest cheerleader. I deserve to have the kind of relationship w/ myself that allows for self-soothing and hard talks and check-ins that reminds me what the truth is. So even when I am feeling overwhelmed, or hurt, or out of control, I can still hold space for positive possibility and a soft heart. . . Reminder: My new guided journal, @todayiaffirm , debuts on 1/1/19. Pre-order at the link in my bio. I’m so excited to kick off our writing practice challenge together! . . Save the date: 1/9/19 from 7-9, I’ll be having a book signing / mini self-care session for my new guided journal @todayiaffirm at the LINE hotel in DC. 100 tickets will be available this week! . . You can per-order @todayiaffirm at the link in my bio. And starting today, there will be a special gift that will be mailed out to those who order!
I’m taking this affirmation with me into 2019. It’s good to have these gentle reminders in our self-care toolboxes. . . What positive self-talk, and self-work, are you carrying into the new year? . . Reminder: My new guided journal, @todayiaffirm , debuts on 1/1/19. Pre-order at the link in my bio. I’m so excited to kick off our writing practice challenge together! . . Save the date: 1/9/19 from 7-9, I’ll be having a book signing / mini self-care session for my new guided journal @todayiaffirm at the LINE hotel in DC. 100 tickets will be available this week! x
I am in this with you. This journey of becoming and finding belonging and meaning in life isn’t to be done alone. And as I hold space for myself, I will also hold space for you.
Ila (eye-la) is almost always this happy. Her big grin in this photo is brought to you by her older sister making fart noises and silly faces In the background. It's truly a blessing to have both of my children be so happy and healthy and full of light. They are ten years apart, but so close and in love with one another. Their sisterhood is beyond heartwarming to watch. . . A lot of you know that Ila came to be after two long years of trying to conceive, and a miscarriage. Words cannot describe how rooted in gratitude my husband and I are for her. She settled the longing in our heart and brought an immense amount of joy and fun to our family. . . After the pregnancy loss before Ila was conceived, I started collecting baby things in preparation for joy to come, but also to soothe my heart. Having a miscarriage was devastating, but as I look back on it now, that profound loss taught me so much about self-trust, leaning into love, and healing a wound that I thought would never close. Healing is such a magical thing!
A gentle reminder to all who need it—myself included. . . @todayiaffirm that i am allowed to take a risk. i will either fly or fail, but i won’t know until i try.
I’ve been having this conversation with my 11-year-old daughter all week as she navigates 5th grade friendships, activities, and learning how to use the power of choice. Teaching Char the importance of being kind, self-aware, and confident is something my husband and I don’t take lightly. We started having conversations about self-permission and self-preservation early on. Now more than ever we dive deeper into these chats as she learns how to move through the world in her own way. . . Our mantra at home: show up, speak up, do your best, and be a leader. . . This affirmation not only serves as a gentle reminder to her, but also to myself. . . Community Conversation Question: What are you giving yourself permission to let go of, leave behind, and disconnect from? What are you teaching the young people in your life about showing up & being their best self?
personal reflections. coming of age reflections. shifting, sifting, and separating reflections. . . what are you appreciating in your relationships these days? what are you longing for and needing?
I’ve been making a lot of lists lately. Most of which consist of me preparing for 30, reevaluating my 20s, and making room in my life for the next chapter. Giving myself permission to be rooted in abundance is something that’s been coming to the surface a lot in my writing practice. Unpacking all the feelings around “what’s next” is teaching me a lot. I’m learning that: 1. I am fully capable of holding space for myself as I do others. 2. I am whole in my body, even after loss and heartbreak and fear. 3. Self-love is setting the foundation for my growth as a wife, mother, writer, and woman. 4. Falling for someone who deserved to catch me shifted my narrative around romance and intimacy. 5. Forgive them, all of them, not for their good but for my own. 6. I can find joy after sifting through all of the junk. My messes and shortcomings and failures have made me more resilient. 7. I am not sorry for my past. It was practice. . . As you walk into the next phases of your life, whatever that looks like, what are you learning? What are taking with you? What are you leaving behind?
note to self: Breaking to make someone else whole is not your duty. Be mindful of how you’re nurturing your relationships, specifically those that are one sided. Learning to decipher where to invest your energy is something that takes practice, awareness, and healthy boundaries. It’s a process, like everything else. ❤️
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